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भारत में शादी विषय पर 1500-2000 शब्दों में निबंध लिखें

आजकल शादियों का मौसम चल रहा है. कल बहुत अच्छा व्यंग्य मैंने बारातियों पर पढ़ा था. प्रसिद्ध व्यंग्यकार राजेंद्र धोड़पकर ने लिखा था. लेकिन शादी पर सदफ नाज़ का यह व्यंग्य तो अल्टीमेट है. जितनी बार पढ़ा हँसने के नए मायने मिले. आपका दिन शुभ और शाम को जिस भी शादी में जाएँ वहां खाना भरपूर मिले और हाँ बारातियों के नागिन डांस के कारण कहीं जाम में न फँस जाएँ, यही दुआ करता हूँ. और आग्रह करता हूँ कि एक बार इस व्यंग्य को पढ़कर जाएँ- प्रभात रंजन 
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भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप के अधिकतर देशों में शादी एक सामाजिक और नैतिक ज़िम्मेदारी मानी जाती है। आमतौर पर शादी समाज की खुशी और नियमों को निरंतर+सतत+अनवरत बनाए रखने के लिए कभी खुशी से और कभी ज़ोर ज़बरदस्ती से करवाई जाती है। समामान्यतः शादी समाज की खुशी’, ‘मर्यादा और सम्मान के लिए समान धर्म+संस्कृति+जाति+उपजाति+हैसियत+रंग+रूप में ही की जाती है।शादी अगर उपर्युक्त लिखे स्वर्ण अक्षरों से प्रतिरोध करते हुए अपनी इच्छा और पसंद से कर ली जाए तो यह एक सामाजिक मसला बन जाता है। ऐसी शादियों से आमतौर पर लोगों की इज़्ज़त वाली नाक कट जाया करती है। फलस्वरूप कई बार पक्ष और विपक्ष के बीच लाठी-डंडे,ठुकाई-कुटाई और कोर्ट-कचहरी तक की नौबत आ जाती है। हालांकि साल दो साल के बाद ज़्यादातर मामले तब निपट जाते हैं जब पक्ष-विपक्ष के रिश्तेदारों का खून अपने-अपने खूनों की तरफ़ खींचना शुरू हो जाता है। ऐसे में प्रारंभ में पक्ष-विपक्ष के लोग समाज-पड़ोसी से सकुचाए छुपते-छुपाते अपने-अपने खूनों से मिलते-जुलते हैं। 

लेकिन जब इज़्ज़त की दूसरी नाक उग आती है तो खुले आम सुखी परिवार की तरह एक साथ रहने लगते हैं। भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप में कई बार शादी-ब्याह इज़्ज़त+संस्कृति के लिए भयानक मसला बन जाता है। ऐसा तब होता है जब लड़का-लड़की अपनी मर्ज़ी से दूसरी जाति,धर्म,कबीले या फिर समान गोत्र में नियम विरूद्ध ब्याह रचा लेते हैं। ऐसे जोड़ों की हत्या स्वंय माता-पिता,रिश्तेदार और समाज वाले कर देते हैं। जिसे ऑनर किलिंग के नाम से अलिखित मान्यता प्राप्त है। दरअसल पूरा भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप भंयकर रूप से धर्म परायण लोगों की बेहद पवित्र स्थली है। ये लोग अपने बच्चों और अन्य लोगों की जान दे-ले सकते हैं, लेकिन अपनी धार्मिक+सांस्कृतिक+सामाजिक +++++ जितनी भी मान्यताएं हैं उन पर खरोंच तक नहीं लगने देते हैं। अपने बच्चों की प्रति इनका भयानक रूप से प्रेम ही होता है (खास कर बेटियों के लिए) कि ये समाजिक+धार्मिक+सांस्कृतिक नियम विरूद्ध शादी रचाने वाले बच्चों की हत्या कर देते हैं। ऐसा वो अपने प्यारे बच्चों को दोजख+नर्क+हेल वगैरह की आग में जन्म-जन्मातंर या फिर लाखों-करोड़ों बरसों तक जलाए जाने से बचाने के लिए करते हैं। मृत्यु के बाद बच्चों को दोजख+नर्क+हेल की आग में न जलना पड़े इसी लिए इन्हे दुनिया में ही खत्म कर दिया जाता है (हालांकि प्रत्येक धर्म कहता है कि हर एक अपने कर्मों का स्वंय उत्तरदायी होता है)। इस महाद्वीप में प्राचीन काल से ही शादी एक ऐसा गठबंधन है जिसमें शादी करने वालों की राय+खुशी+समझ से ज़्यादा समाज की खुशी+राय+समझ को ज़रूरी माना जाता है। इन देशों में शादी व्यक्तिगत पंसद या जरूरत की बजाए सामाजिक और नौतिक ज़िम्मेदारी मानी जाती है। इसी सामाजिक और नौतिक ज़िम्मेदारी का सही-सही निर्वहन करने के लिए बच्चों का पालण-पोषण धर्म+संस्कृति+रिश्तेदारों+पड़ोसियों की पसंद और नापसंद की आधार पर किया जाता है। 

शादी चूंकि निजी नहीं बल्कि सामाजिक और नैतिक मामला होता है। ऐसे में इस विषय पर समाज के हर व्यक्ति को दूसरे व्यक्ति को राय+लताड़+छींटाकशी करने का मौलिक अधिकार मिला होता है। जिसका वे भरपूर उपयोग करते हैं( लेकिन इस अधिकार का प्रयोग आमतौर पर व्यक्ति की हैसियत और पहुंच देखकर करते हैं, पहुंचे लोगों पर छींटाकशी का करने जोखिम प्रायः नहीं उठाया जाता है)। भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप में शादी एक ऐसा त्योहार है जिसे रिश्तेदार+परिवार+समाज+पड़ोसी बड़ी ही खुशी-खुशी मिलजुलकर मनाते हैं। यही कारण है कि लोग बेगानी शादियों में भी अब्दुल्लाह बन कर नाचते-गाते हैं। यहां समाज केवल शादी करवा कर ही अपनी ज़िम्मेदारी पूरी नहीं मान लेता है। समाज+पड़ोसी+रिश्तेदार शादी के बाद जोड़े के पहले बच्चे हो जाने तक पूरी निष्ठा से अपने कर्तव्यों का निर्वहन करते हैं। सामाजिक लोग जब तक शादी के लड्डू,हंडिया छुलाई की खीर और पहले बच्चे की अछवानी ना खा लें शादीशुदा जोड़े पर अपनी कृपा दृष्टि बनाए रखते हैं। अगर पहला बच्चा लड़का हुआ तो समाज अपनी ज़िम्मेदारियों से स्वंय को मुक्त मान लेता है, और किसी दूसरी ज़िम्मेदारी की तलाश में निकल पड़ता है। सारी स्थापित प्रक्रियाओं से गुज़रने के बाद इस स्टेज पर आकर शादी पूरी तरह से व्यक्तिगत मामले की श्रेणी में आ जाता है। इसके बाद पति-पत्नि में जूतम-पैजार हो या फिर कोर्ट-कचहरी में मामला पहुंच जाए, चाहे उन्हें आर्थिक समस्याओं से जूझना पड़ रहा हो और किसी तरह की सहायता की ज़रूरत हो। कोई समाज+संस्कृति+धर्म+रिश्तेदार+पड़ोसी इनके निजी मामले में दखल देने की कोशिश नहीं करते हैं। 

सभ्यता और संस्कृति से ओत-प्रोत मन वाले किसी के घरेलू+नीजि मामले में दखल देना पसंद नहीं करते हैं। हां लेकिन लेकिन अगर बेटी हो जाए तो समाज+परिवार+रिश्तेदारों की जिम्मेदारी ख़त्म नहीं होती है। और जब तक बेटा ना हो जाए तो वो शादी-शुदा जोड़े को मॉटीवेट करते रहते हैं। कभी ताने-उलाहने की शक्ल में तो कभी-कभी बिन वारिस के बुढ़ापे की डरावनी कल्पना करवा-करवा कर। अगल लगातार बेटियों के बावजूद पुत्र रत्न की प्राप्ति नहीं होती है तब समाज इस जोड़े की देखभाल का जिम्मा उम्र भर के लिए उठा लेता है। ऐसे में समाज+संस्कृति+धर्म की अगुवा औरतें-पुरूष यदा-कदा और मुत्तहदा होकर कभी कातर स्वर में रूदन कर के और कभी ताने की राग भैरवी समेत शादीशुदा जोड़े की ख़ैर-ख़ैरियत उम्र भर लेते रहते हैं। शादी अगर अपने धर्म+जाति+उपजाति+हैसियत+नस्ल में की जाए तो अतिउत्तम।अगर इस इक्वेशन में थोड़ा भी फेरबदल कर शादी की जाए तो धर्म+समाज+रिश्तेदार+पड़ोसियों की नाराजगी झेलने पड़ती है। वो ऐसी शादियों में तरह-तरह स्वादिष्ट व्यंजनों का तो लुत्फ़ उठाते हैं लेकिन उनके माथे से बल कम नहीं हो पाते हैं। शादी के सारे इक्वेशन सही जा रहे हों लेकिन कैलकुलेशन में गड़बड़ हो जाए यानी दहेज मनचाहा ना हो तो रिश्तेदार-परिवार ऐसी शादियों को पूरी तरह से सर्टीफाईड करने से मना कर देते हैं। अगर किसी जोड़े या परिवार के दिमाग में क्रांति के कीड़े पड़ जाएं और वो आदर्श किस्म का कम खर्चे वाला ब्याह रचाने को तैयार हो तो ऐसे में भी कई बार समाज+रिश्तेदार+पड़ोसी को आपत्ति हो जाती है। आदर्श शादी करने वाले जोड़े और उनके अभिभावकों को कंजूस और गैरसमाजी माना जाता है। इस तरह के गलत कारनामें से दूर-पार के रिश्तेदारों की भी इज़्ज़त चली जाती है। 

भारी खर्चे और भारी दहेज वाली शादियों से समाज+रिश्तेदार+पड़ोसी सब ही ईर्ष्यामिश्रित खुशी महसूस करते हैं।दरअसल भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप में धर्म+संस्कृति+जाति+उपजाति+हैसियत+रंग+रूप के सारे गुण मिल जाएं तो एक सफल समाजिक जिम्मेदारियों वाली शादी की नींव रखी जा सकती है। लड़के-लड़की की सोच-समझ कितनी मिलती है इन बेकार किस्म की बातों पर अधिक ध्यान नहीं दिया जाता है। यहां तयशुदा नियमों की प्रक्रिया से गुज़रने के बाद ही सफल शादी की नींव रखी जाती है। वरना कई बार तो दो लोगों के द्वारा आपसी समझ से की गई शादी अख़बारों की सुर्ख़ियां और राष्ट्रीय स्तर के बहस का विषय भी बन जाया करती हैं। संविधान द्वारा प्रद्त्त दो व्यस्कों के अपनी मर्ज़ी से साथ रहने की इज़ाज़ को समाज और संस्कृतिक के लोग ज्यादा तरजीह नहीं देते हैं। 
शादियां आमतौर पर समाज में रूतबे,इज़्ज़त और सुरक्षा के लिए की जाती है। हलांकि आजकल समाज में लव विथ अरेंज वाली शादियों का भी प्रचलन हो गया है। इस तरह की शादियां तेजी से प्रचलित हो रही हैं। बस ऐसी शादियों में थोड़ी सावधानी बरतनी होती है, प्रेम करने से पहले शरलॉक होम्स की तरह थोड़ी तहकीकात करनी पड़ सकती है। यानी पहले जाति+धर्म+उपजाति+हैसियत+गोत्र वगैरह का पता कर के प्रेम में पड़ना पड़ता है। इस प्रकार के प्रेम को परिवार-रिश्तेदार मिल-जुल कर अरेंज्ड कर देते हैं। यानी इसमें प्रेम के साथ समाजिक शादी की भी फीलिंग आती है। इस तरह की शादियों में वो सब कुछ होता है जो एक सामाजिक शादी में होता है। एकता कपूर मार्का धारावाहिकों से मिलते-जुलते रस्मों रिवाज,मंहगी और चकाचक अरेंजमेंट और जगर-मगर करते लोग। हमारे भारतीय उपमहाद्वीप में शादी को दो आत्माओं का मिलन माना जाता है। दो आत्माओं को मिलाने का परम पुण्य काम प्रायः परिवार+समाज+संस्कृति के बुज़ुर्ग उठाते हैं। दो आत्माओं को जोड़ने की शुरूआती मीटिंग में बुज़ुर्गों के बीच अहम मुद्दा होता है कि कौन सा पक्ष कितने मन लड्डू लाएगा,लड्डू घी के बने होंगे या फिर रिफाइन ऑयल से तैयार होंगे, डायट मिठाईयां भी होंगी,कितने तोले सोने के ज़ेवर लिए दिए जांएंगे, दहेज में क्या होगा, एक दूसरे के रिश्तेदारों को कैसे और कितनी कीमत के गिफ्ट दिए-लिए जाएंगे, बारातियों का स्वागत पान-पराग से होगा या नहीं, शादी की अरेंजमेंट कितनी शानदार-जानदार होगी? इन बेहद अहम मुद्दों पर सही-सही जोड़-घटाव करने के बाद ही बुज़ुर्गों द्वारा पवित्र आत्माओं के मिलन की शुरूआती प्रक्रिया पूरी की जाती है। हालांकि इन सब के दौरान बार्गेनिंग,रूठना-मनाना, तूतू-मैंमैं की भी पूरी संभावना बनी रहती है। 

दो आत्माओं के मिलन की इस महानतम सोच को लेकर निष्ठा का अंदाजा इससे भी लगाया जा सकता है कि आईआईएम,आईआईटी जैसी शिक्षण संस्थानों से निकले युव

 
      

About Prabhat Ranjan

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तन्हाई का अंधा शिगाफ़ : भाग-10 अंतिम

आप पढ़ रहे हैं तन्हाई का अंधा शिगाफ़। मीना कुमारी की ज़िंदगी, काम और हादसात …

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